Harry Potter

How Harry Potter Has Helped My Grief

Grief

If any of you have read Harry Potter, then you’ll know that Harry experienced grief throughout his life from losing his parents, his god-father and his friends. He might be a fictional character, but I find what he’s gone through very relatable. It will a year in June since I lost my mum and over the last 18 years I’ve lost: my dad, mum, two uncles and two cousins. Yeah, I totally get how Harry must have felt.

When I first started reading Harry Potter, I did feel sorry that he lost both James and Lily in such a devastating way but didn’t really understand. I hadn’t experienced much loss in my life up to that point, but when I reached 14, it’s like someone decided to throw all kinds at me! All during my GCSEs and my A-Levels! It’s bad enough losing anyone who is close to you but nothing compares to the grief when you lose a parent. I think Dumbledore gave one of the best quotes to Harry about this time of loss:

“You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us? You think we don’t recall them more clearly than ever in times of great trouble? Your father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself plainly when you have need of him.”

I never knew how much I would be affected after losing Dad. At first I seemed to be okay since I went back to school two days after he died and I think I was glad of any chance to keep myself busy. People who hadn’t really spoken to me in class before seemed to feel sorry for me (I think a teacher must have told them what had happened) and started to look at me differently. I was an odd-ball to begin with and now I was ‘the girl who just look her dad’. I buried myself into the Wizarding World to escape from what was happening to me in the real world. I never more connected to Harry especially after what he went through in the beginning of Order of the Phoenix. Kids can be really cruel and there was a group of people in my year that started teasing me about losing my dad and one of them even blamed me for my dad dying and said that it would have been better if I’d died instead.

Like what?!

Reading how Harry felt after seeing Cedric die in front of him was so close to my Dad and I. Everything went numb for a while and then the guilt started. I knew there was nothing for me to feel guilty about since I couldn’t have prevented it from happening but funny things go through your head when you’re a child. Harry and his friends had helped through so many aspects of my life up to then from being bullied, being different compared to others and wanting to find a home. Hermione was beside me during my exams and in times when I was hiding in the library with my nose in a book. Ron had his arm around me when the bullies laughed at me in class and targeted me on the way home and Harry…Harry has never left my side. He stood beside me during the funerals of my parents, at night when I cried myself to sleep and during the darkest moments of my mental health.

Harry has helped through my grief and shown me that I am stronger than I know and that the fandom (my family) will always be there for me when I need them. My mental health has deteriorated over the years after losing so many members of my family in a short amount of time and I have felt terrified of being so alone, but again Dumbledore has the right words for me to hear:

“To have been loved so deeply, even though the person who loved us is gone, will give us some protection forever.”

Has Harry Potter helped you through some difficult points in your life?

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